1. If they don’t sign this week, dress up as Santa & turn up at your prospect’s home on Christmas day. When their kids see you at the window waving whilst ‘Ho-Ho-Ho-ing’ they will insist Santa join them for Christmas lunch.
Spend the entire lunch sharing ‘quality Santa banter’...regaling tales of Greenland & sleighs, & laughing uncontrollably whilst getting increasingly hammered on brandy & port. Hand your prospect the contract disguised as a present with a note saying you’ll leave as soon as they sign.
2. Promise to include them in a relentless 365-step email sequence from January 1st – December 31st which will only stop once they commit and pay in full.
3. Inform them you will be cold calling EVERYONE in their company DAILY for weeks on end, to thoroughly ‘multi-thread’ the deal if it doesn’t close on time.
4. Turn up at their offices with your entire sales team dressed as the cast of the Nativity play for an 'impromptu show'...
Then cleverly weave the story of Christmas into a one-hour long sales pitch about your CRM system, complete with a 117-page PowerPoint deck presented by Joseph himself. This will be strategically placed on a screen above Baby Jesus in the manger, subtlety injecting emotion to help close the sale.
5. Threaten to have the entire sales team turn up at every single Decision-maker’s home throughout Christmas, begging to be fed during the festive season due to a lack of commission checks.
6. Have the entire sales team perform as choir singers outside the CFO’S home every morning at 4am in the run up to Christmas:
♪ Come and sign my Lord, come and sign,
come and sign my Lord, come and sign...
Someone’s praying my Lord, come and sign,
someone’s praying my Lord, come and sign...
oh Lord come and sign...♪
